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Name: Alexander Koby
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You need to Pay Koby's Medical Expenses

(Warning: Highly blunt in the typical Koby fashion.)

Today, September 11, 2008 marks 14 straight months of cancer treatment. 14 months of being in Texas, 14 months of doctor's visits, numerous hospital stays averaging 2 weeks a piece, 20 chemotherapy infusions, transfusions, a rollercoaster of blood counts, and a surgery for good measure. I am tired of being in limbo. I am tired of the endurance test and being in Texas. I am tired of weekly trips to the clinic. But and most of all, I am tired of dealing with my medical expenses. So, without your permission, I would like to hand them over to you. You shouldn't mind.

This year's presidential candidates have offered multistep plans which will be the answer to my prayers.

In the last 14 months, my medical costs have accrued to more than $1.2 million. Granted, I have insurance, but I grow wary of receiving those notices in the mail. It would be so much easier if someone, like you, could pick up the slack. After all this is what so many Americans are begging for.

Before World War II, no one expected their employer to handle health care concerns. As battles raged in Europe and domestic resources were running thin, companies offered to compensate worker with medical benefits rather than additional wages. However as tensions abroad simmered, the dependency for passing the buck has increased generation after generation. With the modern medical age, the old system is woefully outdated. Folks are expecting more and more benefits without accounting for neither inflation nor scarcity of resources.

Having a unique knowledge of medical affairs, I feel fully prepared to give you a more than adequate proposal as to why you should accommodate my health care needs. The only thing is, I don't have the gumption to ask you directly for this favor, because it's not like I'm asking to borrow a few bucks for lunch. No, I was thinking more in the thousands, of your earnings. Thus, I will employ a bully, who will use the threat of force, to collect this debt. Though, Uncle Sam considers it more of a donation, since these are monies that you will never see again anyway. Why should you sit in luxury while I struggle to make ends meet? You will see Sam at work, he will visit your house, and he will follow you to a department store. Like I said, I am too passive-aggressive to tell you this outright, but I want you to give until it hurts, because I need it more than you. Only then will it be fair.

I also demand to continue treatment at the best facility in the world. I demand preferential treatment for tests and therapies over those who are older and/or sicklier than I; after all, I am a better investment for long-term survival. I was also born on American soil, and must receive priority over foreigners or illegals with life threatening injuries. However, in 2007 The AMA reported $96 billion in lost revenue for services that went to treat illegal aliens. You should pay that too. Even better, in all likelihood, they will be in line ahead of you; but I don't have to worry. Remember, that under the umbrella of socialized medicine, there is only one health care provider who decides all treatment requests. The government. Simple, right?

Recalling Hillary Clinton's health "security" plan, which Obama has taken a shine to, the fine print was ignored my many of the anchor chair analysts. For instance, if you, a private citizen, needed to have a procedure done, that did not receive financial approval from the government, and you offered to pay a private physician (perhaps an acquaintance) out of your own pocket to perform the operation, both of you could be held liable and be facing criminal charges.

Day after day, Barack Obama says that "we," as Americans, who are struggling, who rise and fall together -- that "we" should embrace personal responsibility in assisting our fellow man, instead of always focusing on "your" needs first. Shane on you. He is also making promises that he would like to rebuild Africa, Haiti and New Orleans. I am confused. Besides, the ladder portion of your strategy doesn't interest me in the least, Senator. I don't care if 47 million people are "living" in the United States lack health insurance. I don't know them, it's not my problem is their kid needs braces or grandmother needs a new hip. As a victim, I am concerned about me, first and foremost. My own skin, my vitality. I don't care if you run a small business and have to cut employment. I don't care if you can't afford air conditioning, gasoline, cell phones and cable. You should be prepared to make sacrifices.

On the other hand, John McCain says those living in the United States should be responsible for their own health care. Plus, he neglects to mention whether or not you need to be a citizen to qualify. McCain also says that, "Americans Are Worried About Health Care Costs." With the democrat's plan, "I" wouldn't be worried about any costs, because I wouldn't be receiving the bills. "McCain will also reform The Tax Code (really, all 30,000 pages?) to offer more choices beyond Employer-Based Health Insurance Coverage. While still having the option of employer-based coverage, every family will receive a direct refundable tax credit - effectively cash - of $2,500 for individuals and $5,000 for families to offset the cost of insurance." An actual quote. Distribute cash cards? Just like after Hurricane Katrina? You seriously expect people to put this money toward health care? That "direct rebate" is going to Best Buy for a 62" Plasma TV. Tell me I'm wrong.

With all of this in mind, I know you are more than eager to break out your cheque books and take care of this little favor for me. In fact, your voter identification cards are a better alternative. After all, I know you're good for it.

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(a.k. 09.11.08)
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